Wednesday, January 31, 2007

Turkey Avocado Club

She brought me a Turkey Avocado Club from Bagel Rising
It is one hell of a great sandwich with
two pieces of crisp bacon, honey maple turkey, Avocado spread, choice of condiment of which I get a thin layer of jalapeño cream cheese , lettuce, tomato, onion, and swiss cheese. I got the plain bagel but any toasted boiled then baked bread with a hole in the middle will do. I scarfed it, with a large black coffee and a side of BBQ chips. oh yeah it was good and only $7 total. For breakfast I usually get the Sunrise Sandwich, it's two eggs scrambled, choice of meat (of which I get sausage in the patty form), a thin layer of jalapeno cream cheese, tomatoes, onions, and pepperjack cheese all melty on your toasted bagel of choice.

Pictured is not the Sunrise Sandwich but this one looks pretty good to me. Eat up suckers.

Tuesday, January 30, 2007

They Getcha with that $1 Menu

I did a class tonight. At the end of this post you can see the tasting sheet. The class went really well and although there was a great deal of cheese, bread, wine and beer I just wasn't satisfied, and I had a grumble grumble in my tum tum.
The special lady wanted to go shopping for a few margarita glasses and what nots for our big cock-tail-party coming up this Saturday! After we picked up a couple of things I dropped her off and went to park the clit and just as I started off back to the apartment it struck me.
With great vengeance and furious anger, I knew I had no chance to fight it. I was going into a McDonald's. A very drunk bum stumbled up to the counter ahead of me and asked whom ever he was chatting with on his cell phone to "hole on" then he ordered a $1 double cheeseburger and I knew it was a sign from the heavens. The McDonald's double cheese burger is truly a perfect ratio of meat to cheese to bun as first discovered and extensively written about by my good friend Fast Danny Willy Nuggins. More about that another day. Suffice to say (whatever that means) I ordered 2, a large fry, and 2 crispy chicken ranch snack roll thing a ma jigs. They were only a dollar as well. The total was $7 even, and the bum eyed my 20 spot when I put er down. I was hungry, now, 2 hours later, I am sick. It will be a while until my next attack but I'm not stupid I will go again and I will regret it. Such is life when you fall of the fast food wagon and get run over by the Hamburglar and Grimace.

Check out below for a killer cheese tasting class.

1. Sel Sur Cher Loire, France

This disk shaped, ash covered, goat's milk cheese is fresh, crumbly and lightly tangy. With age it will develop blotches of grey and blue mold and a stronger, more intense flavor. Served with Acacia honey and the dry Cremant de Loire this pairing is a great start or end to an evening.

Jean Francois Merieau Cremant de Loire Loire, France

This sparkling organic wine is produced with Chardonnay and Chenin grapes from the AOC of Touraine, made in a similar fashion to champagne it is allowed to aged (sur lie) on its yeasts for a clean flavor of apple, pear, and slight minerality accompanied by tiny bubbles.

2. Brebis Ossau Pyrenees, France

Classic, high altitude (transhumance) sheep’s milk aged at least six months. Nutty, creamy and dense in texture with a damp wool flavor finish. This particular wheel comes from a cave which local young bears broke into and ate most of the aging wheels, forcing the Basque cheese makers to abandon the aging process and send them over to us. Pair any semi-soft sheep’s milk with stone fruit preserves.

Naia Rueda Verdejo Rueda, Spain

With 100% Verdejo grape this wine produces a complexity of floral aromas; pear, anise, honeysuckle and dusty minerals mix to create a vivacious and nervy concentrate of deep flavors lifted by an exotic note of citrus zest. The finish is stony and dry to offset the creaminess of the cheese.

3. Torta La Serena Extremadura, Spain

Soft, runny sheep’s milk cheese with a sharp vegetal spice and a robust punch in the face flavor!

Vinedos El Seque Alicante Alicante, Spain

Monstrell grapes grown in the D.O. Alicante with its high limestone terroir produce intense, black cherry fruit and steely acidity while having a lush and vibrant mouth-feel. Spain’s

4. Gruyere Alpage Friboug, Switzerland

Only in the warmest summer months can the Montbéliardes make the transhumance up to the snowlines of the Swiss side of the Jura Mountains, where they dine on wild grasses and their milk is cooked over wood-fired cauldrons in high altitude chalets. This once a year treat is made that much more special with a secret brine washing of each wheel during affinage.

Berkshire Imperial Stout Berkshire, Massachusetts

Big black Russian style imperial stout with notes of chocolate and dark fruit with hints of a light smoke. Strong and robust this beer will warm you during even the coldest Russian winters.

5. Castagna Gorgonzola Dolce Oranavasso, Italy

The Cadillac of Gorgonzola, this blue is big, creamy and full bodied. Made from the traditional Red Cow in Piedmont and enriched with cream for a soft and supple texture.

6.Bayley Hazen Greensboro, VT

From Andy and Mateo’s 37 Ayershire cow’s, this stilton-style blue is made to be soft, savory, decadent and sweet with caramel and cheddar tones and a heaping blue veined bite.

Quinto Infantado Tawny Porto Douro, Portugal

Only A graded grapes are used in this estate bottled port, because that’s all this family grows. Completely foot-treaded and matured slowly and cautiously, this tawny is full of cream, toffee, and spice that stands up to blue cheeses and pairs perfectly with cold winter nights and big chairs place next to blazing fireplaces.

Monday, January 29, 2007

Kiss My Grits

Polenta for dinner tonight. Sure it took about an hour and a half to cook, but man is real polenta worth the wait. Plus "No self-respecting southerner uses instant grits. I take pride in my grits"

I cooked one cup of yellow Marino Felice fine grain corn meal in three cups of water with a tablespoon of Maldon salt. I boiled the water and whisked in the polenta once it was at a rapid bubble. Then the heat went down to a little simmer and the yellow corn meal just lightly blurped away with little spurts and sputters. I sat on the counter next to the stove and happily listened to my little cauldron crank and fart away while reading the endless pages of school work I've due yesterday.
I cut a thick slice of pancetta into large dice, I'd wacked it off the large log that'd been hanging at work. It'd been made from a local hog from Vermont. I helped bring the little guys carcass in and watched our charcuterie guy stuff and roll the fatty belly with peppercorns and juniper berries.
Once my lardons started to crisp I threw in a full head of garlic cloves, peeled but fully intact, and let the entire mess brown up.
A bright green handful of haricot verts blanched in salted water for literally less than a minute went into the pan with the garlic and pancetta and took on all that salty savoriness. Holy shit now my polenta is ready and its creamy as hell so I give it a drizzy of nice olive oil, a crack of pepper and a few grates of parmagiano. The pork, beans and garlic get plated, the polenta flanks, relaxing into a nice pool, thick but not quite set, and BOOM! I fry a few farm fresh in the pancetta drippings and slide them from pan to plate, crowning the polenta. Fresh parsley and one more drizz of oil and I'm ready to eat. We pop a nice light red from south western France, it's spot on with the salty pancetta. When the egg yolks break and oozes onto the polenta it almost makes me cry.
Cheap, simple, if not time consuming, and utterly perfect. This dinner will go down in the books, or should I say on the blog.
To truly gild the lily I baked off a tray of financiers. Wow my special lady dusted them with powdered sugar and served em up with a nice piping mug of Earl Grey. Nothing is better than a good meal...

This guy's last name is Polenta, what a luck devil.

Friday, January 26, 2007


I made some Poutine at work today. We had cheese curds, potatoes, oil for frying and I made a sad and quite nasty gravy out of some condensed veal stock shit. But after it was all done, everyone ate it and only one angry Dutchmen said he didn't like it.
True Poutine seems to be one of those things that just doesn't transport. Originated in Quebec this Canadian dr/j - unk food is now a classic north of the boarder. Here it seems a bit heavy and not to tasty while eaten sober.
I hand cut a couple russet potatoes, heated up a big ol pot of sunflower oil (not a bad oil for frying) and parfried the taters until soft. Then I cranked the heat and in small batches fired them off to a crisp darkish brown. Toss in salt and you have some nice fries. They could have been better but I was watching the counter as well and had to run off a couple of times....The gravy I went real lax on just opened a puck of veal demi glace mixed with water and added to a roux I'd whipped up. It turned out really gross. The cheese curds were anything but fresh, and as I understand, the key or one of the key elements is to have squeaky fresh cheese curds to melt under the hot fries and gravy, which I have learned is supposed to be a Velouté sauce.
So my first crack at Poutine was slightly so so, but I won't be thwarted. I will try this Canadian delicacy again ey.

Friday, January 19, 2007

Twistable Base?

Miller beer to be first to use (Cold Can) Technology
....The beer can is in for a technology makeover that will shake-up the beverage industry, and it’s being brought to you by a company called Tempra Technology, which has ambitious plans for their cold can technology.
....The specially modified cans use proprietary engineering to create a temperature drop that will reduce the I.C. Can contents by a minimum of 30° Fahrenheit in just three minutes. When activated, the all natural desiccant contained within a vacuum draws the heat from the beverage through the evaporator into an insulated heat-sink container. It is this patented vacuum-power which lowers the temperature so dramatically and quickly, leaving the beverage inside cold.
....The I.C. Technology is 100% safe non-toxic and environmentally benign, because the whole process is the driven by the simple physics of water evaporation.
....The average American drinks 22 Gallons of beer annually, and even though this product would demand a large price premium over a traditional can, the convenience factor and bragging rights would make this a must have item. Camping and fishing will drive the initial sales, and as volumes increase more and more uses will be found. Expect the first cans to show up on store shelvesin mid-2007.
What does the above mean for cheese? Absolutely nothing, but I ask you when are they going to come up with a wheel of cheese that will come to room temperature right from the fridge in less than 2 minutes with a twistable base for our eating enjoyment.

Thank goodness these things are coming out in Miller Beer! Personally I can not wait.

Birthday Bird

Yesterday was Bird's Birthday! Couldn't get on the blog cause it was broken. So Happy Birthday Bird Man you're old as hell now.

Wednesday, January 17, 2007

Bit Nipply Out...

It's really extremely cold out today, nine degrees or so. What I hate most about winter days like this is when I hear someone say, "well, I guess they were wrong about that global warming thing". What a stupid thing to say on a freezing cold day. To the right is sign language for cold, seriously it is. Below is the first image that came up on a search for "cold" on google. I edited the boobies to keep her kosher. This post has nothing to do with cheese...except to say that cheese is a wonderful meal option for wintery days. Try these cheese soup recipes.

Tuesday, January 16, 2007

Quit your Wine-ing.

Let us talk briefly about wine. I drink it, occasionally, every night or so, a glass or three. But when I'm pairing up some cheese, well I reach for a nice beer. Now I say nice beer cause Miller High Life isn't gonna cut it. Not ta say that the champagne of beers is anything but perfection on a hot summer night for chasin down big old burgers and rings. But when it comes to a special hunk of fromage - ales, lagers and stouts can't be beat. Plus the fermentation process that barley and hops go through are closer chemically to the fermentation process lactic sugars undertake in cheese when compared to grape fermentation in wine.
Wine is just harder to match with cheese and this stuff shouldn't be so difficult. The easier the pairing is to think of, the better it usually ends up. So the next time you find yourself with a nice hunk of washed rind beautifulness or a hearty English cheddar, flip that cork screw over and crack yourself a nice barley pop.
Because U Deserve What Every Individual Should Enjoy Regularly.

Road Sodas Rule!

Monday, January 15, 2007


So this is picture of a room made of cheese puffs. That's it I guess. But the question I have is: How many cheese puffs did the person who made this eat while creating this masterpiece? and: Is that Asian lady gonna eat some of those? and: Aren't those cheese puff people grossed out by standing on a floor and in a room made of their own flesh? Gross, crunchy and delicious.

Only 350 days until 2008

It's January 15th a Monday and my first blog. Welcome to Stinkstown where the cheese is smelly and so it the blogger. I am Caseus, yes it really is my real name. Keep coming back for stupid stories, rants, and information on useless but important things. Such as cheese.

Last night we did a tasting class at work, yeah I work at a cheese shop. Swiss, German and Austrian cheeses with beers and wines to match. Below was our tasting sheet number five was the all out winner for the night. A small class 12 people total but all were interested and had plenty of good questions. Only one nice looking young lady but she had a boyfriend, want waaaa.

1. Varuna Puschlau, Switzerland

A tomme style cow’s milk cheese that blends Italian and Swiss flavors of cream and baked herbs.

2. Mascaplin Switzerland
Goat’s milk from the Swiss Alps

Pinkus Mueller Hefe - Weizen Germany
An organic wheat ale made with some barley but mostly wheat malt and hops. Citric flavors and an astringent mouth-feel make this beer a perfect match for goat’s milk cheeses.

3. Sibratsgfall Berkasle Austria
Lightly smoked cow’s milk aged for four months with hints of chestnut, cream and honey.

Schlenkerla Helles Lagerbier Bamberg, Germany
This smoke beer is made in copper kettles but does not use smoke malt which gives it a clean crisp finish with the characteristic balance of spice and bacon in the nose, a nice pair with the smoke and honey flavors of the cheese.

4. Senne-flada Switzerland
Stinky soft cow’s milk in the reblochon style. Notes of coffee and cream.

Kalmuck Gruner Austria

5. Gruyere Alpage Friboug, Switzerland
Only in the warmest summer months can the Montbéliardes make the transhumance up to the snowlines of the Swiss side of the Jura Mountains, where they dine on wild grasses and their milk is cooked over wood-fired cauldrons in high altitude chalets.

Ettaler Doppelbock Germany
Sweet dark beer with notes of chocolate and figs. Yum